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Wednesday, June 25, 2008

HOW TO SURVIVE A RELATIONSHIP...


In the initial stage of a relationship everything seems to go so well you wish things could never have been better. Well thats the first mistake you make. Nothing stays the same. Things change, people change, relationships change. Therefore we need to change along with it.
We all want the happily ever after. But is there any such thing as happily ever after??? Well there are for some few lucky but what about for the rest...I really doubt it. Most People have to struggle to make it through the day without breaking up the relationship.
For me the root of all failed relationships are the EXPECTATIONS. We either expect too much or too little. In every relationship there will be one spouse who always expect too much...and these are the people who are left disappointed...and there starts the crack in the relationship. And while all this is happening the other spouse is unaware.
COMMUNICATION. The second failure. When things get tough we need to communicate, if not things can never change nor get better. We bottle up so much that in the end it becomes this huge volcano ready to erupt, and when it does the ending isn’t pretty. So therefore we need to say what needs to be said at the time we feel it, don’t keep it lock away.
NAGGING. We don't like to be told the same thing again and again and do we need a mother hen hovering us. Companionship is what we seek in a relationship, not someone who is at our case 24X7. When the nagging starts the relationship starts to crumble because one of the spouse end up getting tired and may turn in to wrapping up of the relationships.
SPICE. When life starts to go on clockwork it should be a wakeup call to us. That's usually when we try to seek for the extra spice. Some search for it in the relationship and some elsewhere. If you are lucky then it’s in the relationship, if the later then it’s just pure bad luck...So at some point in a relationship there needs to be spice of some kind, something new, something out of the blues.
TRUST. There will come moments in every relationship where this trust is tested. It might be just a minor issue or just something major. But the enemy of every relationship has been doubt. This doubt may start small...but when it grows it would eat through the trust until nothing is left but mistrust and deception and pretense. Therefore when ever you are face with a trust issue trust your instict, just don't follow whatever is being said to you...Its you who has to face the music in the end...so let the decision be yours and no one elses.


HONESTY. We always try to hide stuff. Things that we are ashamed of, things that we are scared of. But in a relationship we need to share...even the dirtiest of the secrests. The more that we share the closer we get. People may do things that they feel guilty about telling their spouses...but in the end its about being honest...try it...you'll feel peace in the relationship ...and the level of trust would grow for sure.

And finally PATIENCE. very relationship has their on's and off's, and in order to survive it we need patience. If a spouse has the patience to tolerate all the above said taints then the relationship had won half way. When things go wrong one patient partner could save a relationship, but without it, it doesn’t stand a chance.There will be all the above said things in every relationship, some more and some less. But it’s those who balance them who champion a relationship. And even if it does survive then it sure is one hell of a miracle :)

4 comments:

MN said...

I feel that patience and trust are the two most important things in a relationship. Specially trusting. This may go both ways, but trusting the gut feeling is not good all the time. Nice post.

SoE said...

well in either case it can be hard work sometimes. It's tiresome.

shweetikle said...

goiy dhoo kurumaa understanding are as important as trust i believe..

EmXee® said...

hey this is my job.
i mostly write about this kinda articles:@
actuly ur one v good feels jalouse keep the good work i hope u use that theory in ur life.......

goood luck
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survive that :P
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