????

What do you do when you get something you want but you aren't sure whether its real or not

TIME HEALS...MEMORIES REMAIN

TIME was supposed to be the greatest healer of all...but along with this time comes it ally...MEMORIES which never fades...so no matter how much time passes...the memories are ever fresh...and along with brings all the emotions that we long to forget...

TOO MUCH FREE TIME ON MY HAND :)

Drew these when I got bored in one of the lectures and did the rest when I got bored at home...

EVERY ONE HIDES BEHIND A MASK...

Masks. We all wear them. Some wear it to conceal their fears, hurt, because they are scared of revealing their true selves. Some wear it because they are ashamed or guilty of who they are. Some wear it to gain other peoples approvals by hiding their true self.
But there are those who use these masks as to conceal their evil natures. They pretend to be your friend or your ally and will strike when you least expect them to. One moment you think you know that person but then the next you realize how wrong you were. It was all an act. You are then face to face with the real person behind the mask, and then you wonder to yourself, if a person you knew so well can be wearing masks why the rest can’t.
It’s hard to know who is who anymore. Betrayals have become common practice. Hurting one another a new kind of culture.
As the saying goes what goes around comes around, I do believe that one day they would have a taste of their own sick games and know how much it hurts to know that the person you thought you knew was just another stranger behind a mask.

WAITING...

In the last couple of month’s lots had happened in my life which had thought me a few valuable lessons.

One of them was about trust. I learnt that trust is not something that everyone can afford. People say that we are supposed to trust our instincts, but what do you do when the same instincts proves you wrong, or leads you to make the biggest mistakes of your life???

Well there is always the “life teaches you a lesson” theory right. Which is right infact. It sure has taught me more about myself than I knew.

It had taught me that I can cope with almost anything in my life. Life had thrown some mean punches my way but I had always risen through them with a little help from my family and a lot from my friends.

So in the end I had learned that things never do stay the same nor does it go according to how we think they would. That is the beauty of life. It’s a mystery, just like one of the neatly wrapped gifts you receive. You just have to open it to know what’s inside. It may not always be something you expected.

My life’s pretty messed up now but I know they won’t stay like that forever, one of these days I’ll get out of them and figure out the bigger plan that fate has in store for me. Like they say, there is a dawn after every dark night. Well my dark night is here, I’ll just have to wait for my dawn.

FOR THE TIME BEING...

I want someone to wipe the tears from my eyes
But for the time being I'm gonna let them roll down
I want someone to cheer me up when I'm down
But for the time being I'm gonna live in the blues
I want someone to catch me when I fall
But for the time being I'm gonna keep on falling
I want someone to love me
without reservations...unconditionally
But for the time being I'm gonna wait
like I wait for everything else in my life...

Another birthday...Another year Older...Hopefully Wiser too

HOW TO SURVIVE A RELATIONSHIP...

In the initial stage of a relationship everything seems to go so well you wish things could never have been better. Well thats the first mistake you make. Nothing stays the same. Things change, people change, relationships change. Therefore we need to change along with it.

We all want the happily ever after. But is there any such thing as happily ever after??? Well there are for some few lucky but what about for the rest...I really doubt it. Most People have to struggle to make it through the day without breaking up the relationship.

For me the root of all failed relationships are the EXPECTATIONS. We either expect too much or too little. In every relationship there will be one spouse who always expect too much...and these are the people who are left disappointed...and there starts the crack in the relationship. And while all this is happening the other spouse is unaware.

COMMUNICATION. The second failure. When things get tough we need to communicate, if not things can never change nor get better. We bottle up so much that in the end it becomes this huge volcano ready to erupt, and when it does the ending isn’t pretty. So therefore we need to say what needs to be said at the time we feel it, don’t keep it lock away.

NAGGING. We don't like to be told the same thing again and again and do we need a mother hen hovering us. Companionship is what we seek in a relationship, not someone who is at our case 24X7. When the nagging starts the relationship starts to crumble because one of the spouse end up getting tired and may turn in to wrapping up of the relationships.

SPICE. When life starts to go on clockwork it should be a wakeup call to us. That's usually when we try to seek for the extra spice. Some search for it in the relationship and some elsewhere. If you are lucky then it’s in the relationship, if the later then it’s just pure bad luck...So at some point in a relationship there needs to be spice of some kind, something new, something out of the blues.

TRUST. There will come moments in every relationship where this trust is tested. It might be just a minor issue or just something major. But the enemy of every relationship has been doubt. This doubt may start small...but when it grows it would eat through the trust until nothing is left but mistrust and deception and pretense. Therefore when ever you are face with a trust issue trust your instict, just don't follow whatever is being said to you...Its you who has to face the music in the end...so let the decision be yours and no one elses.

HONESTY. We always try to hide stuff. Things that we are ashamed of, things that we are scared of. But in a relationship we need to share...even the dirtiest of the secrests. The more that we share the closer we get. People may do things that they feel guilty about telling their spouses...but in the end its about being honest...try it...you'll feel peace in the relationship ...and the level of trust would grow for sure.

And finally PATIENCE. very relationship has their on's and off's, and in order to survive it we need patience. If a spouse has the patience to tolerate all the above said taints then the relationship had won half way. When things go wrong one patient partner could save a relationship, but without it, it doesn’t stand a chance.There will be all the above said things in every relationship, some more and some less. But it’s those who balance them who champion a relationship. And even if it does survive then it sure is one hell of a miracle :)

MY DA-DA-LING IS 4 :)

Today my Da-Da-Ling turned 4 :) I still remember the day when she was born...she looked like this tiny little angel...so fragile...
I fell in love her from the first moment i laid eyes on her... She is the apple of my eye and I misss her :(
This is the first time and I know not gonna be the last time she celebrate her birthday without me...but i sure wish I was there with her...
Anyways Happy Birthday Shuko...May you grow up to be just like ME :)

DISAPPOINTMENTS...

Never should expect anything from anyone....cause expectation leads to disappointments...especially in love...don't expect anything in return...cause you never know when you heart is going to be trampled over

UNSURE....

I sense there's something in the wind

That feels like tragedy's at hand
And though I'd like to stand by him
Can't shake this feeling that I have
The worst is just around the bend

:)

just cant help smiling :)

FALLING...

Falling from anywhere is always painful...but the most painful of them all is fall is falling in love
When you fall from a chair or maybe the stairs you can get up and mend the bruises or the broken bones...and with time the scares will fade away before you know it
But when you fall in love...you feel like you are hit by a thousand bulldozers...it knocks the wind out of you and you are never able to recover from it
As for the healing or getting over it...we'll if the love is true then there is no getting over it EVER...you are stuck with it for the rest of your lives...
Its not always that bad I guess but it always depends on the person with whom you have fallen in love with...it’s that person that counts...
If he is a Mr. Wrong then God oh God you in for a long series of painful episodes and if it’s Mr. Right then the pain would continue but you will be comforted with the idea that there is someone to ease the pain
No one can or ever has evaded from falling…falling…falling in LOVE
So why fight it…it can’t be that bad…RIGHT????

FAREWELL FEVER

In the past week I had had two surprise farewells, and stupid me didn't even suspect a thing :s

The first one was given by my offcice mates. My cux dragged me saying that she needs to go shopping, then it turned to a wedding and then finally a coffee with some dude...and wen she was changing her mind all this time I had no idea that someting else was cooking...(I was so tired to think had a tiring few days) I was so surprised when everyone (except two) in my section was there...even my boss was there :D I had so much fun that night...thanks niya for all the lies

And then I got my second surprise last night...But this time I knew that something was cooking...the same niya was so insistant that I go to this weddding of her offfice mate...I thought I was one step ahead this time but alas I wasn't

Guess where the party was...at my own home and I didnt have a clue :S silly me dho...Niya took me to her house and man oh man she was slow at getting ready...she litrally dragged her feet on the way home...When I went home lots of relatives, friends and office mates were there...the BIGGEST surprise of all was the gift given by Niya and the gang....the SUITCASE I wanted from EVINCE....Ufalugos kiriyaa nurovuneeee...they are the BEST

One more funny thing happened on our way to my home....Niya said we were going to a wedding and I forgot my slippers at home so had to go and get them, and on the way she said lets stop at dejavu to get a gift for the wedding...so we went there and while Niya was talking on the phone her bag knocked a vass and it crashed LOL

It was soooo hilarious...For the first time in my life I went to buy a gift and then came out emppty handed a little less on my wallet :D

Overall I had a BLAST

BRIGHTER THAN SUNSHINE

What a feeling in my soul
Love burns brighter than sunshine
Brighter than sunshine
Let the rain fall, i don't care
I'm yours and suddenly you're mine
Suddenly you're mine
And it's brighter than sunshine

I didn't have the strength to fight
Suddenly you seemed so right
Me and you
What a feeling

BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR

What you desire may not necessarily mean what you need
Desire had lead to lots of disasters
And I hope and wish that what I had desired
And the road I'm leading doesn't lead to one

FUTURE????

Future. There is nothing more scarier than what the future holds. Some people wish that they can look into it, so they can be prepared for what is about to come....but can anyone ever be prepared for what the future brings.....A begger today, a millioner tomorrow and vice versa. So how can we be prepared for the what the future bring?????

HYPERRR

I know I haven't written much about what is going trough my life for the past couple of months. Lots have happened in the time being...I had changed the office I had been working....got a scholarship...gone to one of the most disastrous outing and one of the most fun..
But currently I had busied myself with the ijthimaaee committee of my offfice by helping out in the futsal tournament...by being a cheeeerleader cause there is a competition to choose the best supporting squad and we are sure in the lead :D
I am having soooo much fun these days...I'm always HYPER these days....so full of energy...I wanna Jump...Run....Skip

SOMEBODY STOP ME :D :D :D

COURAGE....HOPE....FAITH :)

Let the past be where it is

and make new discoveries each and every day
So what if we made mistakes,
so what if we failed,
so what if we lost,
So what if we get hurt,
We would always have tomorrow
To right what was wrong
To champion in what we lost
To get over the losses
To heal the wounds
All we need is just a little
COURAGE....HOPE....&.....FAITH :)

I didn't mean it when I said I didn't love you so 
I should have held on tight I never shoulda let you go 
I didn't know nothing I was stupid, I was foolish 
I was lying to myself 

The feeling that I'm feeling now that I don't hear your voice 
Or have your touch and kiss your lips 'cause I don't have a choice 
Oh, what I wouldn't give to have you lying by my side 

When you left I lost a part of me 
It's still so hard to believe 
Come back baby, please 
'Cause we belong together .....

FAIRY TALES???

You know when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales? That fantasy of what your life would be – white dress, prince charming who’d carry you away to a castle on a hill. You’d lie in your bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, prince charming –they were so close you could taste them. But eventually you grow up and one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is, it’s hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely because almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope and faith that one day they would open their eyes and it would all come true.

Grey's Anatomy

Its been five months since you gone away
left without a word nothing to say
So I ask God
God send me an angel From the heavens above
Send me an angel to heal my broken heart
From being in love
'Cause all I do is cry
God send me an angel
To wipe the tears from my eyes....

PAIN....

Pain, you just have to ride it out, hope it goes away on its own, hope the wound that caused it heals. There are no solutions, no easy answers. You just breathe deep and wait for it to subside. Most of the time pain can be managed, but sometimes the pain gets you when you least expect it, hits way below the belt and doesn't let up. Pain, you just have to fight through, because the truth is you can't outrun it, and life always makes more...

-Grey's Anatomy-

DON'T WANNA BE ALONE

People are lonely in this world for lots of different reasons. Some people have something in their disposition. Maybe they were just born too mean, or maybe they were born too tender. But most people are brought to where they are by circumstance, by calamity or a broken heart or something else happening in their lives that wasn't anything they planned on. People are lonely in this world for lots of different reasons. The one thing that I do know is, it doesn't matter what any one of them might tell you--nobody wants to be alone.

-Taken-

WOUNDS.......

People have scars. In all sorts of unexpected places. Like secret roadmaps of their personal histories. Diagrams of all their old wounds. Most of our wounds heal, leaving nothing behind but a scar. But some of them don't. Some wounds we carry with us everywhere and though the cut's long gone, the pain still lingers.

What's worse, new wounds which are so horribly painful or old wounds that should've healed years ago and never did? Maybe our old wounds teach us something. They remind us where we've been and what we've overcome. They teach us lessons about what to avoid in the future. That's what we like to think. But that's not the way it is, is it? Some things we just have to learn over and over and over again.

-Greys Anatomy-

ONE QUESTION?

Don't you just have that one question that seems to keep repeating over and over in your head

And you know the person with the answer is nomore but you just long to ask

WHY?

SO I'VE BEEEN TAGGED

A- Available?: for....?

B- Best friend: Samurai :D

C- Cake or Pie?: Cake

D- Drink of choice: Coke

E- Essential thing used everyday: My glasses

F- Favorite color: Purple, Pink and Blue

G- Gummi bears or worms: Gummi Bears obviously

H- Hometown: Male'

I- Indulgence: Books and internet

J- January or February: What the difference?

K- Kids and names: No kids YET

L- Life: Full of lesson to be learnt

M- Marriage date: Hmmmmm havent thought about it YET

N- Number of siblings: 4

O- Oranges or apples: Oranges

P- Phobias: Cockroaches, being in confined places and heights and spiders and all insects and animals EXCEPT small cats and rabbits :D

Q- Quote: Life is for living

R- Reason to smile: Don't need a reson to smile :D

S- Season: when its neither tooo hot nor rainy

T- Tag three people: finifenma, shan, forgiven

U- Unknown fact about me: Well guesss its UNKNOWN

V- Vegetable you do not like: Spinich

W- Worst habit: Trust too easily and Wasting time being too good to people who don't deserve it

X- X-rays you have had: Head, Wrist and Feet

Y- Your favorite food: Chocolate Fudge

Z- Zodiac: Cancer

Sometimes I wish that I could turn back time. Go back in time and change the fact that I had ever met you. Wipe you from my life. Erase you from my memories. Ease the pain.

But then I wonder, how my life would have been without you. I would never had known how it feeels to be in love and be loved in return by you. I know that the memories you and I had made, few, these memories will help to keep you alive in my heart. And it will also help to ease the pain and maybe I will be able to look at a new day without regrets. If not today then perhaps tomorrow

???????

How can you tell the difference between LOVE.....INFATUATION...or a CRUSH

WHY?????????????????

Why cant I seem to let go of the pain
Why cant I seem to forget you
Why does it still hurts so much
Why cant I stop crying at night
Why cant I seem to let you go